WDGS?

What Does God Say?

God says:

I am His daughter.

I am His bride.

He will love me eternaly.

 I am worthy.

He made me to be great, and to do great things.

He made me to love, live and give.

So then why do I doubt this daily? Why do I refuse to be loved by other people as much as they do? Why to I forget what God says? Why do I not do as he asks daily?

But God won’t let me beat myself up for these things. No guilt. I am His daughter and bride who will fight for Him and in times when I feel down I will remember that He loved me so much to let His Son die for me, and that I was worthy enough. He made me to succeed and I chose to succeed in Him to help this world. I will love the widow, the orphan, an refugee. I will Give my time. I will live my life for Him.

I hope to wake up every morning knowing that this is what I’m living for.

Lifes like a Red Flyer…

As peoples lives have changed this year, mine has too. I look back on all the  friendships that have been picked up onto the forever moving wagon of life, and they aren’t coming back. Somehow, I am ok with this. It was time for these friendships to take their leave and be on their ways. I will have my memories, and thats enough for me…

Getting something

I truly believe that I’m going to get a lot out of this retreat to Catalina. I hope God will use those around me to grow, and I pray that he uses me to help those around me grow.

for those of you reading this, I would appreciate some prayer on:

-Direction for some important opportunities that have come up.

-For growing in leadership

-For God to keep me focused

I dunno if I’ll get a chance to write before we leave Sunday, but I hope that you all have a great week next week

p.s if anyone needs prayer for anything lemme know.

Trying

To develop a better relationship with my mom. I wish I would have tried harder when I was in high school instead of just exaggerating on all the stuff she restricted me from and didn’t let me do. That damaged our relationship. She did let me do more than most moms though.I still think she was pretty rad for letting me go to concerts with Jonathan on school nights.

Lets look at Jesus’ relationship with Mary. They were close, and she learned so much from Him. Why can I not try for that?

My mom has noticed my extra efforts and has said something about it. How she has noticed. I like that. I ask my self everyday how I can make things better between us. I love my mom to death. I just don’t love the way we treat one another. I’ve told her before I don’t mean to get so annoyed with her. Or to be rude at times to her. She understands. But I know it doesn’t make it OK.

Gods working on this and so am I.

I get to me sometimes

I let all the small things build up inside me and then I get all flustered about it all. I think that is where I went wrong during my managing period at Albertsons. I was a walking stress ball.  I try to hide it now though. I’m so constantly stressed about so much that my muscles are often achy.

Yesterday I paid my car registration. Thank God I could do it at AAA and not go to the DMV where I would stress on if my number got called, what if I miss it, what if I have to go to the bathroom, are people looking at me weird. Ya, those things go through my mind. I felt like a huge weight was lifted once I slapped that sticker on my car.

I guess what i’m trying to say is I worry way too much. I’m turning into my mom, aunts, and grandma… HELP!

Rob Bell

You rock  my socks…

la,La,LA,lA,la….

things sound like that a bit lately… NOISY.

Happy is a place where I want to be…

An emotional wreck.

That’s how I feel sometimes.

Today was such a happy day. God filled it with so much joy, and peace and loveliness. I felt growth today. Small group was just amazing. I love each of those girls, and how they just make me feel like a true woman of God even more so.

Then there’s times when things just remind me of the past. Or I think about things or people I miss. This just brings me right down; somewhere where I am in-between in emotions and feel like I could cry out with frustration.

Happy is a place where I want to be. A place to dwell on all the good times and not on how much i miss this person or that memory or that good time.

The enemy just wants to suck me right out of happy. I know life isn’t perfect. But sometimes this sucks…. I’ll be OK.

Rain / Reigns…

This 4 day weekend has been so up and down. I’m actually glad it’s over.

I wrote in a twitter yesterday,” today I have realized a ton of things. had some interesting conversations. at the end of the day God is love. Amen.” I’m not going to go into details. But I have realized that I am worthy of good friendships. Ones that will have Jesus as their stronghold.

Most of my life I had worked to keep friendships that were better off not being friendships.  I worked harder to keep them than they were worth keeping. Those friendships have left huge scars on my heart. Wednesday night at large group I cried for those scars. Never realizing how much they really hurt. I’m glad I cried. I needed to let go…

And as the rain falls outside my window, a vision of peace fills me. I Know that at the end of the day God says I am worthy. God is love. and He reigns.

<3

Dear  present heart,

You are no longer in the driver seat of my emotions… You thirst for well water and can easily be deceived. From now on my mind and soul will be working together to change you. To make you thirst after the living water. To want nothing more than to truly go after Gods own heart knowing that that’s all I need.  Can’t wait for future heart…-Me